you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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