So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
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