He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
