So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
