Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
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