I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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