I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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