So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
