I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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