so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
