DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
