why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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