Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
