Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
