i think my tv is drunk
i just google imaged poop.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Let's paint friendship bongs
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
