xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
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