I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
