I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
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