pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Randomize
