butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
What drink are we having for lunch?
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize