What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
