so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
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