Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
