So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
