Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
