I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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