I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
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