Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
