He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
