The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
