I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
