I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
