My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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