Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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