i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
