How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
