My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
