i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Michael Bay diarrhea
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
