Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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