We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
You are the jesus of drinking
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize