I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
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Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
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