Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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