tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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