Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
This is classic penis vs brain.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Randomize
