You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Randomize
