It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
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