Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg đđ
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I should have known it wouldnât work. Someone saved in her phone as âSubway Sexâ called the week before the wedding
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