My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
she peed on how many people?
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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