Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
This baby is an asshole
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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