Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
